Secrets To A Lasting Marriage. By Julie D. Andrews for Your. Tango. com. These real- life couples have been in the marriage trenches and they're still laughing, smiling and having a ball. Here, their secrets to making love last for the long haul. You really have to like each other to last. Norman Rockwell prints, framed Norman Rockwell prints, matted Norman Rockwell prints. Shop National Geographic for atlases, books, magazine, DVDs, travel clothing, outdoor gear, photography equipment, gifts and more at National Geographic Store. Stunning in its quality and location, Oasis villa is an amazingly private family compound just a short walk from the Caribbean Sea. Overlooking St. When the sex becomes less important, you better enjoy doing things together (while still doing things apart). We drive for days to car shows sometimes. So we better like each other. This included my neon- light beer signs, a Jethro Tull poster, a bedroom set collected from at least four non- matching sources, a bamboo sofa, a brick- and- wood bookcase and a roll- top desk from my youth.
Financial problems lead to divorce. We didn't want our relationship to deteriorate over something as inconsequential as money. We've been through financial ups and downs, including bouts of unemployment and significant credit- card debt. But we never cast blame and remain calm during financial discussions. And eat marshmallows to improve communication. What's the one thing you can't possibly do with a mouthful of marshmallows? Communication is more about listening than talking. I tell my wife, if something I say can be interpreted two ways and one of those ways makes you sad or angry, I meant the other one. This has rubbed off on me and he reciprocates. My own saying about marriage is, 'A good marriage is made up of a thousand small kindnesses.'. My father told me to be sure to do this when I got married. It makes it impossible not to physically touch each other! Laugh together. Times are tough. Tragedy happens in all families. Things will go wrong. But if you find ways to laugh about it, you'll form a special bond and can overcome anything! It's not a luxury to have one place in the house that you don't share. Forty- five years of hearing your partner gurgle his way through the theme song to Bill Dance's fishing show is guaranteed to start you off in a bad mood. There's nothing romantic about watching your hubby dearest attack the hairs in his ears or yank out an offending nose hair. His scream is guaranteed to send chills down your spine and put off your hunger for that yummy meal he's cleaning up for. Men want to feel respected.. This may sound odd but it's true. Don't emasculate your man. Don't take your woman for granted. Life gets messy, boring and stressful. Your marriage will have seasons when it's stronger or when it feels anemic. Whatever you did in the early days that made you laugh together, make time to do those same things after 1. Read to each other from a favorite funny book. Watch a favorite funny movie. Since we married, we've maintained one night a month to go out as a couple. When our children were infants (under six months) we'd take them along, we didn't just sit in the house. It doesn't have to be just you two. Go with other adults or couples. This allows you to have adult conversation and keeps you from hashing over household problems. Unless you have a baby under six months, no children allowed. Don't discuss problems or major issues. The activity doesn't have to be expensive. Have a club room in your apartment building? Host a pot- luck for some friends. You won't have to worry about cleaning for company! A win- win solution. Concern for our children has also been a strong force. Once you have grandchildren, the family bond is greatly reinforced. Everybody has their rough spots, but if everything is focused on past hard times, your marriage can become like an albatross. Remember and revel in your successes. Ignore the times when you failed. Don't look at problems to place blame, only to find solutions. Love is like a boomerang, throw it at your spouse and you'll find it coming right back at you. Put your relationship first. Be open and flexible to change. These tidbits sound ordinary but we've seen so many relationships break up because one or both partners refused to do these 'common sense' things. Almost all problems are short- term. Divorce is a long- term answer. And if money becomes an issue, get counseling immediately. That was one of my criteria in getting married. Our three children are unfortunately handicapped—right handed. We knew it was important to still be individuals. We each had things we wanted to get done personally. We wanted our work goals not just supported but understood and facilitated. It hasn't always been easy. My husband put up with my two rounds of higher education and five startup companies. Today, I put him on a plane for a tour of duty in Iraq. I might not personally believe in sending troops overseas but I believe in him and know this is important to him. You have a new best friend now. Make sure to have 'your time.'. Keep your sex life interesting. Listen to each other's fantasies. Do not be afraid to dress and act sensual in the bedroom. And plan exciting vacations together. Too often we show more respect to strangers than to those we love. Parents often expect manners from their kids but don't use them with each other. They're not just for dating. But rather than be irritated by our differences, we revel in them. We find each other's foibles endlessly amusing, much like watching exotic animals in a zoo. Not a day goes by without my laughing so hard I cry at my husband's making fun of something I'm doing. We tease each other a lot. It's never mean- spirited. And we're both psychiatrists to boot! We had friends who judged us for leaving our kids so often. They are now divorced. When couples have that, every bump in the road is on the way to somewhere that matters. Without the dream, every bump in the road is a mountain to climb over. Finding your dharma, or what your unique service is to the planet, creating a larger context of meaning in life, puts the little stuff in perspective and makes it easy to process.! Check out Huff. Post Divorce on Facebook and Twitter.
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Song of Myself. Won't you help support Day. Poems? 1. 81. 9- 1. I celebrate myself, and sing myself. And what I assume you shall assume. For every atom belonging to me as good belongs to you. I do not know what it is any more than he. I do not laugh at your oaths nor jeer you; ). The President holding a cabinet council is surrounded by the great. On the piazza walk three matrons stately and friendly with twined arms. The crew of the fish- smack pack repeated layers of halibut in the hold. The Missourian crosses the plains toting his wares and his cattle. As the fare- collector goes through the train he gives notice by the. The floor- men are laying the floor, the tinners are tinning the. In single file each shouldering his hod pass onward the laborers. Seasons pursuing each other the indescribable crowd is gather'd, it. Seventh- month, (what salutes of cannon and small arms!). Seasons pursuing each other the plougher ploughs, the mower mows. Off on the lakes the pike- fisher watches and waits by the hole in. The stumps stand thick round the clearing, the squatter strikes deep. Flatboatmen make fast towards dusk near the cotton- wood or pecan- trees. Coon- seekers go through the regions of the Red river or through. Tennessee, or through those of the Arkansas. Torches shine in the dark that hangs on the Chattahooche or Altamahaw. Patriarchs sit at supper with sons and grandsons and great- grandsons. In walls of adobie, in canvas tents, rest hunters and trappers after. The city sleeps and the country sleeps. The living sleep for their time, the dead sleep for their time. The old husband sleeps by his wife and the young husband sleeps by his wife. And these tend inward to me, and I tend outward to them. And such as it is to be of these more or less I am. And of these one and all I weave the song of myself. I resign myself to you also- -I guess what you mean. I behold from the beach your crooked fingers. I believe you refuse to go back without feeling of me. We must have a turn together, I undress, hurry me out of sight of the land. Cushion me soft, rock me in billowy drowse. Dash me with amorous wet, I can repay you. I will accept nothing which all cannot have their. I am possess'd! Iowa, Oregon, California? O welcome, ineffable grace of dying days! I plead for my brothers and sisters. Comment on Day. Poems? If you are like us, you have strong feelings about poetry, and about each poem you read. Let it all out! Comment on this poem, any poem, Day. Poems, other poetry places or the art of poetry at Day. Poems Feedback. Won't you help support Day. Poems? Click here to learn more about how you can keep Day. Poems on the Web . All rights reserved. The authors of poetry and other material appearing on Day. Poems retain full rights to their work. Any requests for publication in other venues must be negotiated separately with the authors. The editor of Day. Poems will gladly assist in putting interested parties in contact with the authors. |